Packing Heat

The youngest and I, through extensive Research and Development, have come up with two outstanding ways to carry an exhausted (and sometimes recalcitrant) three year old.

The first and most conventional is call "Up High." The Up High position is assumed by hoisting the exhausted child up on your shoulder with one leg to each side. He is then able to fold his arms on top of your head and use it as a pillow (see graphic below).

The Up High carry position is both practical and unobtrusive. Indeed passers by tend to smile and enjoy the obvious felicity of both child and parent. One note of caution: MAKE SURE you shift the child from shoulder to shoulder to minimize strain. Also, take a few Advil once you get to the hotel.

The second, and more controversial, position is called "Bunch of Banana's" or, as pronounced by our three-year-old, "Banana Batch" or "Banana Pants," depending on how he holds his mouth and how tired he is. "Bunch of Banana's" should be reserved for time when your child is so exhausted he cannot be trusted to maintain balance on top of your head.

Note: This is pretty exhasuted since on almost all occasions our boy can be fast asleep and safely ensconced in the "Up High" position. "Bunch of Banana's" is done by first positioning the child in the "Up High" station and then allowing them to slide their head down behind your head and onto your shoulder. Hold the arm and leg dangling at your front and voila', you can continue your trek.

See the diagram below:

"Bunch of Banana's" is more comfortable than "Up High" and lends itself well to covering large distances quickly. It does, however, draw unbelieving stares from passers by. More funny than the stares, however, is the fact that the boy requests it when he's tired, and that you can tell how thoroughly asleep he is by the periodicity of his arm and leg swinging across your back.

I hope you have enjoyed this brief tutorial and wish you well in its application.

Regards.